The '4 B's' of millionaire dating: beauty, brains, body, and balance

Money makes millionaire men picky when dating a future spouse, according to Janis and Carly Spindel of Janis Spindel Serious Matchmaking Inc.

I spoke with the mother-daughter matchmaking duo for Business Insider's monthlong series on the elite dating world of the superrich, “Dating Like a Millionaire.”

They said millionaire men seek the “Four B's” in a partner: beauty, brains, body, and balance.

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Millionaire men are “super picky.”

At least, that's the case when it comes to their future spouses, according to Janis and Carly Spindel, the New York City-based mother-daughter matchmaking duo of Janis Spindel Serious Matchmaking Inc. I talked to them, along with several other elite matchmakers, for Business Insider's monthlong series, “Dating Like a Millionaire,” for an inside look at the jet-set dating world of the rich. They all work with clients, locally and globally, who have net worths ranging from the low millions into the billions.

The Spindels rely on word-of-mouth for business, and client fees run from $25,000 for basic private matchmaking to $1 million for global VIP private matchmaking. While they introduce their clients (men only) to matches (women who apply to be members), the clients set up their own dates. They also offer a gay division for millionaires.

“We're not a dating service,” Janis, who's been in the business for more than 30 years, told Business Insider. “There's a difference between a potential [spouse] and a blind date. We don't fling dates, we make sure [the match] is exactly what he's looking for.”

And what he's looking for revolves around what the Spindels call the “Four B's” — beauty, brains, body, and balance. This is the key criteria they set for accepting women members.

There's no getting around the fact that half of those four B's lie in visual appearance. That's because, according to Janis, “what does she look like？” is the first thing men ask when the Spindels find a match for them.

Read more: The 3 biggest mistakes millionaires make when dating, according to 6 elite matchmakers who help the ultra-wealthy find love

“Men are visual creatures,” she said. “It's in their DNA ... They want beauty inside and out.”

“Men fall in love with their eyes,” Carly added, saying that attractiveness — both when it comes to body and beauty — means something different to everyone. These qualities are also true of men seeking men — they want a hot man and a fit body, she said.

But it's not all about the looks. Millionaire men also love a woman who's smart and can teach them something, Carly said. That includes holding a great job and having intellectual, stimulating conversation, she said.

Ultimately, they want a well-rounded partner — someone with a balanced lifestyle, who has their own career, relationships with friends and family, and a sense of adventure, Carly said: “Men want someone who enriches their life and makes it even more fantastic.”

“With money, your brain thinks differently,” Janis added. “They call the shots; they want the whole package.”

But millionaire men need to be careful — acting entitled or too picky can breed unrealistic expectations. According to several matchmakers, it's one of the biggest mistakes millionaires make when dating.